when it was found I'd fallen to the earth,
I lost the timeless and found the world,
I found for the first time I could lay, first time I could stand,
and now I have dreamed I can fall again and again
never less painful, never less far
always from top to bottom,
never where you are.
too many cooks but there are no good pots,
so let's just starve and dance while the food rots
shuffle and pass and read from what you can
we're lost apart
and together we're just a big scam
apart we're lost and together we're just a big scam
the fusion failed but we can have one more game
we can try one more game
It is indeed how civilized we are
How we brought its traces everywhere
it is the dis eases and plagues
that have become a part of us
it is the many souls we have killed
to give us land and wealth
it is the perfect record of lies
in our treaties with the first nations
it is a pain a curse i live with every day
it is a gift of privilege and domination handed to me
a sickness of the soul that I wish my tears could cure
if i were realistic
and could compromise this world
with its hungry and forgotten
while the food stores go rotten
if it could but learn to accept
institutionalized murder and theft
and the need of right to hate left
i would dream in colors mixed
of one part solipsis
and one forgetting this
pain in the mind and heart
come to find
the world can't command our hearts and hands
i was there before i was
never born yet walking
in the beautiful darkness
of the eternal void
looking to the stars
and the darkened earth
soft shimmering twilight
of strange sounds and sights
i walked unborn and alone
in the great mother's womb
on that day there was light
and that day the world was filled
i was in fear and wonder
as life and death appeared
and the day i found you
i found something so beautiful
it brought me back
to the darkness
and the beauty of the twilight
and on to the sun
something beyond this long death and long life
of a world that has unexpectantly become.
songs recorded August 4th & 5th, 2002, 5 years before I met my soul sister, Gezaldami, whom I had shared a telempathic connection with since my fractured stress-induced psychosis episode around 1987 or 1988, but never discovered in this incarnation cycle until July 2007, the time the Dinsencha wand guardian was constructed to heal the fractured potentialities streams that could have destroyed Earth and Chegua both. Years after, during the start of the covid shut down, I
discovered and documented my indigenous Abenaki heritage which was informing and demanding be heard so many years earlier in 2002. 2 years after helping blockade monument road with the Missisquoi band resisting sacrilege, demanding sovereignty, and renewing the call for our landback.
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